I once had a second cousin with acute mental retardation who pleasured herself in public. It was near impossible to reprimand her, as she didn’t quite understand social norms and conventions, and therefore couldn’t see the fault of her action. Thus she’d go on rubbing it out wherever she became aroused – whether in the privacy of her bedroom or the not-so-private living room during a family gathering.

Mix tapes are love letters. (When’s the last time you got one of those? You’re welcome.) And while I’m not trying to fuck you, this mix WILL get you laid. Fact. If this doesn’t happen–and I don’t mean to sound like your father–you’ve somehow managed to screw up a sure thing. At least your failure came with a rad soundtrack.

If you’re relaxing in a treehouse somewhere in Los Angeles, stop what you’re doing immediately: the Department of Building and Safety is charging you with a felony and coming to remove your treehouse at once. It is dangerous, and you cannot be trusted to play on your own.

The World Cup is over. Damn. Got to get back to real life. But first, a recap of the 2010 World Cup’s most defining moments: the good, the bad, the ugly and the beautiful.

Along with the recent release of their debut album, Gamble House will be supporting Rogue Wave on their upcoming Summer tour, including a special Lollapalooza after-party on August 6th at Schubas in Chicago.

While hanging in Dolores Park, SF last weekend, Dave Rickett presented us with a poignant ballad about how the best time of your life might not just be under your nose, but on the top of your lip. This is a seriously exclusive video.

“They sound like Jesus and Mary Chain.”

Yeah, who gives a fuck? The Rolling Stones sounded like Chuck Berry and nobody seemed to mind. Plus, Jesus and Mary Chain never made me dance the way The Raveonettes’ newest album, In and Out of Control does. And I seriously doubt JAMC would openly discuss their passions for sausage with a stranger… Suni Rose Wagner of the Raveonettes, however, doesn’t give a damn. Don’t believe me? Read on.

The Los Angeles Music Video Festival (LAMVF) is the brain child of recent USC grad Sami Kriegstein. Two years in the making, LAMVF was conceived solely to celebrate the art of the music video.

Two weekends ago, Erik Stinson, Danny Santos and Eliseo Cabrera ventured down to Los Angeles from Oakland with only one quest in their hearts: to seek out the last remnants of glam. In other words, do as much blow and lounge at as many fancy pool parties as possible.

No, your eyes do not deceive you, that’s “Indian Burritos.” As in, a whole new dimension of fusion cuisine. As in, Koji ain’t got nothin’ on it.